At the dinner table on Thanksgiving day, we were answering questions from this game that has conversation prompts specifically for Thanksgiving. I some how managed to draw one that had to do with photography (of course), and then the next go round I got the question, “What is something that you are grateful for, but take for granted?” I immediately answered a list of things like running water in my home, electricity whenever I flip a switch, the ability to pay for the basic necessities in my life. Because those ARE things that I am so grateful for and rarely take the time to recognize my gratitude for them. But a couple of days later, as I lay in bed trying to fall asleep (like a typical extrovert, this is the time when my mind runs wild and free), it dawned on me that the most important thing that I take for granted that I should be most grateful for is my BODY. My body. The mass of cells and organs and blood and bones and muscles that carry me around all day long. I am not always happy with how this body looks, which in the grand scheme of things (and to my feminist mind) is annoying and silly, but the feelings are there. Eve Ensler put an illustration to my affliction in her book, In the Body of the World. She talks about how, before she got cancer, she went through times in her life where it was like she was just a balloon head, with no body. She had experienced things and felt certain ways about her body to where she just wanted to disconnect from it. I totally get this.
My body has not experienced all that Eve Ensler’s has, but I do understand the concept of going through the world in a way that I give great acknowledgement to my head while I ignore my body. Any compliments I typically give myself seem to apply from the neck up – “I’m smart”, “I’ve got good hair”, etc. And this is the biggest shame! What a waste! I might be overweight but I am healthy. My body allows me to do a job I love, to carry me places and experience wonderful things. I think this is why boudoir can be so terrifying for women – it brings you into your body. You are made so aware of your body. Your head is connected to your body and you are a whole human. But then this is the empowering thing about it – once you have been brought back into your body, you see that it’s not so scary after all. You appreciate it and you celebrate it. And you are brought to a place of gratitude because this body, no matter what shape yours is, is part of you. It is you. And you are uniquely beautiful. Let’s work on being grateful for our bodies, deal?
